


But I Know When You're Gone, I'll Wish I'd Held On

by sullacat



Series: Across the Universe [4]
Category: Star Trek (2009)
Genre: Emotional Infidelity, Fatherhood, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Married Life, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-04-16
Updated: 2011-04-16
Packaged: 2017-10-18 04:58:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,472
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/185288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sullacat/pseuds/sullacat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Every relationship has its low points... (mention of past Jim/OFC)</p>
            </blockquote>





	But I Know When You're Gone, I'll Wish I'd Held On

**Author's Note:**

> Really there are two storylines going on here, hence the length, but I felt that blended together it was more like a real look inside the ship and the people that live/work there. ~~I hurt them because I love them.~~
> 
> Kirk needed a ready room, so I gave him one. I feel that JJ Abrams will agree with me on this. [Memory-Alpha](http://memory-alpha.org/en/wiki/Portal:Main) is this author's best friend. No infringement intended,no profit made.

_stardate: 2268.31_

On the official schedule it was listed as a meeting of senior engineering staff to discuss suggestions for installing the new plasma infusers, but the private gathering in the Recreation room was significantly more entertaining. The Chief Helmsman of the Enterprise was getting married in a few weeks, and Scotty insisted Sulu be thrown a bachelor party the likes of which shan't be heard of again.

In the end, it was a fairly muted affair by 23rd century standards - it wasn't as if they could have gotten an Orion dancer out here, or talked one of the women on board to jump out of an over-sized synthesized cake. Someone brought out some cards, and they played poker, smoked cigars, and told dirty jokes.

"So, have you decided on a place to go for your honeymoon? Or rather, has she told you where you're going?" Scotty asked, pulling out another bottle of his homemade amber brew and passing it around.

Sulu shook his head. "I think we're going to wait until leave starts, and tour the old country back home. Two, please," he said to Bones, who was dealing. "You?" Sulu asked, one eye on his cards while he spoke to Scotty.

Scotty sighed exaggeratedly at the cards, as if he'd been dealt another bad hand. "Aye, I'm going to Saturn for a few weeks. I've an appointment with a harem girl or two... oi, give me another one, Doc," he said to Bones, accepting the new card and shuffling the cards in his hand.

"Where are you guys going, Jim?" Sulu asked, looking over at both of them.

"Haven't decided yet," Jim answered. 'Haven't decided' was code for 'neither of us has won the argument so the decision hasn't been made'. Jim wanted to try his hand at scuba-diving, an idea which scared Bones shitless, thank you very much. Since Jim had gotten his way and they'd spent their vacation time at the end of the last five-year tour doing something Jim wanted, Bones thought it would be nice to spend this upcoming leave, their second five-year tour completed, doing something he wanted to do - namely, sit around on his ass and rest.

 _These cards were useless..._ Jim dropped them on the table with a quiet "Fold," and a sigh. "Thanks for nothing," he frowned at Bones, tapping his cards as Bones rolled his eyes at him.

"Still, it will be nice to get married life started somewhere you both can be together for a while, away from the hustle and bustle of this ship." Jenkins said, coming up from behind them to watch the game. "Don't get me wrong, I love this ship, but it can get a bit claustrophobic at times."

"I think she's more excited about coming back here, getting to work on Enterprise," Sulu chuckled, folding his own cards in front of him. "She's bringing her research with her, going to collaborate with the medical folks."

"It's going to be different with the wife on board," Scotty maintained. "Not going to be able to come down and have fun like you do now." He put down his cards in front of him. "Straight, king high," he called out laughing, taking the chips in the pile as the other men groaned and cursed.

Jim laughed and nodded his head. Bones narrowed his eyes but didn't say anything. "Yeah, the good old days are over," Jim agreed, taking another drink from the bottle he claimed as his own, just catching the look Bones was giving him. "Present company excluded, dear," he joked.

Bones wore a false smile and nodded, but it was pretty clear that he wasn't going to be a happy drunk tonight. _Great_ , Jim thought to himself as he looked around at the new cards that he'd received, cursing to himself.

* * *

"You were a downer tonight," Jim said later than evening when they were back in their rooms, as he headed for the food synthesizer and got himself a glass of water.

Bones ignored how Jim was going into his stash of hydrocortilene that he kept in pill form for Jim's headaches. "You just sounded so bored of your sad life here. A little young for a mid-life crisis, don't ya think?" he asked as he headed for his desk and the work he missed tonight going to that stupid party.

"It's not like I'm going to go - what, you think I want to go mess around?"

Bones chuckled bitterly. "Well, if it's so boring now, go ahead, be my guest, Jim."

"Oh, go fuck yourself, Bones. You used to be able to take a joke."

"They weren't at my expense then, Captain. I'm just your regular punchline now."

"Whatever," Jim muttered. "I'm going to bed," he said, pulling off his shirt and tossing it on the floor. "Coming?"

Bones sat down on the sofa. "I've got to get this profile ready for Christine before I leave for that damned Shore Leave Planet. You remember I'm leaving in two days?" he asked.

The scenic planet had been experiencing an epidemic causing visitors (and those who lived there) a nasty plague that had already killed ten people. The planet was off-limits while the epidemic raged out of control. Bones had been tapped by Starfleet to go assist the medical staff there, a three-week mission to help find an antidote and get the illness under control.

Both men turned their heads when the computer chirped. "Urgent personal message for Captain Kirk."

"You want me to-" Bones nodded toward the bedroom, picking up his notes in case he needed to leave the room for the confidential information Jim seemed to get at all hours.

Jim shook his head. "No, it's alright. I'll take it here," he said to the computer as he walked to the video screen.

 

 **Starfleet Message: Personal and Confidential to KIRK, JAMES T, Captain USS Enterprise:**

A video began playing, but it wasn't anyone from Starfleet that either of them recognized. It was an older woman, coughing into her hand then looking nervously at the camera.

"Hello," she began. "My name is Marjorie Dawson. I live on Epsilon Canaris III. My niece was Carol Marcus." Both men's faces furrowed at that name, Bones turning to look at Jim, still intently studying the screen. "I don't think you were in recent contact with her - she told me that last time I asked about you." The woman's face fell, and she looked near tears. Jim's face twisted in confusion as he glanced over at Bones, then back toward to the screen. "I though that someone should tell you - Carol was killed in an accident a few days ago."

"Jim, what is she-" Bones started, then stopped because the woman began talking again.

"I didn't ask Carol about her personal life, or the decisions she made because she was always such a smart girl, with her head on her shoulders. She took care of everything the way she wanted, and even if I disagreed, I didn't think it was my place..." The woman stopped again, taking a deep breath to steady her nerves. "But she's gone and and you need to know about David." A hint of a smile ghosted across her face. "He's ten now, and he's a lovely child. Smart as a whip, just like Carol was, and a good boy, really, such a good boy," she said, her voice trailing off. "But he's alone now, and I'm not going to be able to take care of him like he needs looking after."

Looking into the camera, she sighed. "He's your son, Captain. I don't know why she didn't want you to know, but she's gone now, and God forgive me, I think you should know."

She held up a photograph of a laughing blond boy. "This is David. If you can contact me soon, I'd appreciate it. I can keep him here with me for a while, until we get his mother buried and decide what to do with her possessions but I'm not well. I'll be returning to the hospital soon, so I'll need to know what you want-"

The face on the screen froze. Bones looked down to see Jim's hand on the controls, pausing the message. His face was as pale and tight as Bones had ever seen it. For several minutes they just stood there, looking at the screen, Bones waiting for Jim to say something, anything.

But he didn't. Instead he pressed the button again. "-me to do with David. I'm the only relative he has on Carol's side. I didn't know if you had people, or if you wanted him in a school, or.... I suppose you should meet him first. That is, I hope you want to meet him. He is a good boy, and he's having a hard time right now, but-" there was a tight, sad smile on her face - "maybe getting to know you would be the best thing for him. A boy needs a father, I always told her that."

The message ended there, with some words on the screen. Bones saw that they were her contact information. He took a step closer to Jim, resting a hand on his back. "Come sit down," he told him, leading him to the sofa where he'd piled his journals and PADDs, pushing them aside to make room for them. He wanted to ask if Jim was alright, if he could do anything for him, but when he opened his mouth, he heard himself ask, "Did you know about him?"

The look Jim shot back was beyond angry. His eyes were full of hurt and doubt and confusion. "Of course not," he whispered. "I didn't - I mean, I don't even know- why would she say that he was my kid?"

"You two were pretty involved," Bones reminded him. "She was as close to a girlfriend as I ever saw you have."

"We had some fun," Jim said, "but she was so serious about school. Went off to some study program, I think."

Bones remembered more clearly than Jim, he could tell. He remembered a lot about that year, watching his best friend really coming into his own - no longer thought of as some hick, screw-up daredevil but growing into himself, at the head of most of his classes, putting in enough extra credits to finish a year early.

He also remembered Jim dating Carol, the one girl he kept around longer than a few dates. She was smart and pretty, and watching them together, watching Jim be with someone, not just looking to score - it was the first time Bones had ever really been jealous of any of them.

But then she'd left for some research program in South America, and then Nero turned their lives upside down, and in the middle of that Bones and Jim decided that they wanted to be more to each other than just friends, and then they took off for space, and neither thought of Carol Marcus again until this evening.

"What the fuck am I supposed to do, Bones?" Jim asked, looking down at his knees.

"There are ways of finding out who his father is. Well have him tested, and then... I don't know, Jim. Let's just find out first, alright? Then we'll figure out a plan." Standing, he pulled on Jim's hand until they were both up. "C'mon, let's go to bed, it's too late to think straight right now," he said, wrapping his arms around Jim, who was one huge bundle of nerves. "Shhh - it's late and we won't know anything until tomorrow. We'll talk about it in the morning, okay?" Bones told him, holding his face in his hands. "Time for you to get to bed."

"Yeah," Jim said, but they both lay there in the dark for a long time, not saying anything.

* * *

It would be a few days before the Enterprise was in close enough range to be able to talk to Marjorie Dawson, even at warp 9. Even so, Jim gave the order for the course change, sending them to the research station Carol had been working on, near the Romulan Neutral Zone. Next he notified Starfleet that he had an urgent personal matter to attend in that sector.

After than, Jim closed the door of his captain's ready room. He pulled the screen up on his terminal and entered his private access codes to gain entry into Starfleet records. "Computer, on video. Show me the Starfleet records for Marcus, Carol."

The computer displayed a list of Starfleet promotions, beginning with her graduation in 2256, the year after Jim left. She began working on the USS Jonas Salk as a molecular biologist, making her way up to Chief of Research on a Federation Research Station, ARK-7, just last year.

The last bullet point was her death a few days before.

"Computer, show me Marcus, Carol - personal information." The computer brought up photographs of her in school as a young girl, and in her cadet uniform at Starfleet Academy. Information was streaming past on the screen as well. When a young child's face appeared in a photograph, Jim called out, "Computer stop." He looked at the face, in this photograph he was very young still, but laughing. Jim stared for a long time, unable to think about anything else but how much the boy looked like him.

"Computer, information on Marcus, David, son of Carol Marcus." The computer chirped out his date of birth and that he was currently living on ARK-7 with his mother. Jim asked for the boy's father. "No father listed," the computer answered. Jim stared at the photos. "Computer, continue visual images." A few more photos, that was all, but by the end of it Jim was pretty sure he was the child's father. His gut told him that this was no joke.

* * *

By the time Bones walked into their bedroom that evening, Jim was already in bed. "Hey," he said, as he began taking off his clothes. "I meant to come see you earlier, but we had some computer problems. Took most of the day to get the records straight, and I still don't feel ready to leave tomorrow." He looked over at Jim. "You get information?"

"Just some stuff from the computer," he said, reading one of the books Bones gave him on the American Revolution. "Hungry?"

"No, I had a really late lunch, its got me all messed up now," he muttered to himself. "I'll probably get hungry in the middle of the night or something stupid like that, but I'm so tired I could drop right here." He yawned widely, then sat on the side of the bed, looking over at Jim. He looked tired, too. "So, what are we going to do?" he said, reaching over to touch Jim's leg.

Jim's eyes watched as Bones sat down, then returned to the book he was reading. "I don't know. I've been thinking about this all day long." He looked over at him. "I don't want to talk about it right now. Is that alright?"

Typical. "This isn't something you can sweep under the rug," Bones told him in his Doctor voice.

"Perhaps you missed our radical course correction," Jim answered in his 'I am Captain, don't fuck with me' voice, "but I am on top of the situation."

"And once you get there? What are you planning on doing about this?"

Jim groaned. "I'll think of something. Just - not now, alright?"

Bones refused to let it drop. "You're going to see him in a few days, don't you think you should have a plan in mind?" he asked as he slid into bed.

Jim ignored him.

"You can be such an idiot sometimes, you know that?" It felt like the same fight they had always had - Leonard had been calling Jim an idiot as long as he'd known him, but now... the words seemed to have a special sort of vitriol behind them.

Jim gave him a look that told him exactly what he thought of that. "Contrary to what you're always telling me, I do think on occasion. I'm not the stupid kid you used to know."

"Well, you could have fooled me," Bones muttered as he turned and went to sleep.

* * *

The alarm went off at 0530 as it always did, but as Jim shifted to get up, Bones reached out to stop him, pulling him back down on top of him. Morning sex was his favorite, both of them warm and smelling of sleep, half-awake fumbles against each other, breathing hard as their pants were pushed down and hard flesh pressed against each other. No talking, just the occasional moan or curse word or name whispered against a bare chest.

Soon they both lay spent, panting. "I missed this," Jim said. "I know its been rough lately, and we've been super busy, but God, I miss being with you."

Bones wrapped his arm around him, pulling him closer and pressing one more kiss on his mouth. "I didn't want to leave with you angry at me."

"I'm not mad, Bones," Jim exhaled, rolling off of Bones to sit up on the side of the bed. "Just been tired lately. I never thought I'd say this, but it's going to be good to get off this ship, take some time away from being captain for a while, you know?"

"I know you've got a lot on your mind, and God knows I wish I could stay here and help you, but this-" Bones looked at his travel bags, packed neatly and waiting for him. Swinging off the bed, he sat next to Jim, their legs touching.

Jim nodded as their fingertips brushed together. "You can't ignore this - people are dying and it's too big a mission to leave to anyone but the best, and that's what you are, Doc." He sighed, leaning next to Bones. Three weeks was about as long as they'd been apart since they'd met. "It's okay," he said, more to himself than to Bones. "I need to do this. I don't know, maybe its something I need to do on my own."

Bones tried not to let that comment hurt him - he knew Jim didn't mean it like that but it still stung. "If you need anything from me, you'll let me know?"

"Yeah, of course. I'll write every day," Jim promised.

"Liar," Bones said, kissing him before heading for the shower.

Once they were clean and ready to go, Bones stopped Jim again by the door. "I love you, kid."

"And I love you, grumpy old man." They clung to each other just a fraction harder than they had in the last few months. Bones wanted to say more, but Scotty was waiting in the shuttlebay.

"Want me to walk you down to your shuttle?"

"No, its okay," Bones said. "I'd rather say goodbye here."

"Its just three weeks," Jim reminded him.

"I don't like being gone, not with this happening," Bones told him. "I wish I could help you more."

"I'll be alright. Send me a message once you get there."

Bones nodded, kissing Jim on the forehead before turning and slinging his bags over his shoulder and heading out the door.

* * *

"Captain." Jim turned toward Uhura's voice. "I've a message from Starfleet on a private channel."

"Put it through in my ready room," he said, entering the small room and reading the communique.

The message was short. Since they were already heading toward the Romulan Neutral Zone, the Enterprise was being asked to collect the staff from a research base that was being abandoned due to increased hostility in the area. Jim didn't think would be a problem, but it was routine to discuss missions like this with senior staff, so he sent a message for the senior bridge crew and Scotty to meet him to discuss the memo.

Soon they were all sitting around the table, Bones' space filled by Nurse Chapel. "The Romulans are promising that they won't attack while we work to remove the researchers," Jim began as the screen behind them displayed the images of their destination. "I suppose for the moment we'll have to trust them."

Jim tapped his fingers across his desk, a sign they'd all learned to mean that he was worried, so they all sat a little straighter, paying attention. "When we enter the Neutral Zone I will be traveling to one of the nearby bases to deal with some personal business. Spock will be left in charge of the ship, and I want Scotty and Sulu to coordinate with the station and get those people and their research on board in three days. That's as long as I want to spend here." He looked up. "Discussion?"

When they had all given their input into the situation, Kirk dismissed them. "Spock, might I have a word with you?" he asked as everyone was leaving.

"Certainly," he said, moving to seat himself across from Jim's chair. "Do you require assistance, Captain?"

"I might," Jim admitted, explaining to the first officer about the boy on ARK-7. "I will be sending a sample for medical verification that he's my son, but I don't want this to be run out of the sickbay. Can you handle it for me?"

"Of course," Spock answered. "If I may, Captain, you don't appear as anxious as I would expect one who heard this sort of information to be."

Jim laughed. "My lack of anxiety worries you?"

Spock shrugged. "It would be logical that this new revelation would be, at the very least, disconcerting. You appear at ease with this information."

"I'm certainly not at ease," Jim admitted. "But I can't imagine any reason for the lady in question to lie about it. If she wanted something from me, then she would have told me while she was alive." His memories of Carol had been warm, friendly. A smart woman who clearly wanted more out of life than a tumble in the hay. He decided he liked smart and stable, and upon further reflection, falling in love with Bones was just the next step.

"I've had a couple days to digest it," Jim continued, looking out the window at the stars as they passed at warp 9. "And I guess there isn't anything I can do until I get there and look at him."

Spock folded his hands in front of him, listening. "Is it possible that someone is using this as a diversion?" he inquired, "It seems unlikely that he should be located in the same system as our mission."

Jim was again thankful he had this logical Vulcan on _his_ side. "I found out about him first," Jim answered, "but you're right, it would be a clever ruse, to get someone into the ship by pretending they were family. I'm not sure I'd use a little boy as the decoy, but... I'll take it under advisement. Thanks," he said. "And thanks for taking care of that medical issue. I'll send you the sample as soon as I get there."

"Have you made arrangements should the child be yours?" Spock wondered, standing.

Jim sighed deep again. "Not yet. I've got some ideas floating around," he indicated his head, "but nothing concrete. It's still so up in the air."

Spock nodded, evaluating his captain. "You are hoping its true, aren't you, Jim?" he said, making the switch in conversation from professional to personal, the slight nuance something that had taken some time to achieve but had truly deepened their friendship.

"I think I do," Jim admitted. "I mean, the idea scares the hell out of me, but at the same time, I didn't think I'd ever have one of my own, you know, with Bones..." _But a son..._ The look on Jim's face said it all - the idea thrilled him.

Spock's lips twitched slightly. "It would seem fortuitous if it were genuine, then, despite the circumstances." He headed for the door. "And if I might be a bit presumptuous, Jim, congratulations. I hope it works out for you."

* * *

 **Starfleet Message: Personal and Confidential to KIRK, JAMES T, Captain USS Enterprise:**

Got here with just a bit of turbulence, didn't get sick. The place is gorgeous but all I've seen is the research lab, which is top rate. Going to work on samples - the data they have is unbelievable, will be able to investigate the source of this disease and create any number of vaccines for years with a sample of this size and variety of species who've been ill. Take care of yourself. -B

 

 **Starfleet Message: Personal and Confidential to MCCOY, LEONARD H, CMO USS Enterprise on Shore Leave Planet, Omicron Delta System:**

Got new orders, heading into Romulan Neutral Zone, I'm going to ARK-7 to see kid; yeah, a little nervous. Do me a favor while you're there, check into their head researcher, Tonia Barrows. She's applied to Enterprise as Science Officer for next five year mission, am told she's a rising star in her field. Could use someone new here, free up Spock for other duties. Interview her for me, I'll go on your judgment. Love you. - Jim

 

 **Starfleet Message: Personal and Confidential to KIRK, JAMES T, Captain USS Enterprise:**

Romulan Neutral Zone? Are you kidding me? Jesus, Jim, please be careful. I imagine Starfleet said something like the Romulans promised to behave but you and I both know what crap that is. Just be careful. I'll check on her, just from the time I've been here I'm impressed. Seems more than competent, and her lab is cleaner than even mine, which is saying something. Good luck with the boy. Miss you, kid. - B

 

 **Starfleet Message: Personal and Confidential to MCCOY, LEONARD H, CMO USS Enterprise on Shore Leave Planet, Omicron Delta System:**

Too much interference for further communications, will probably be last message until we leave neutral zone. Don't worry about me, Bones, I'm always careful. Will contact when I can. Miss you, old man. - Jim

 

"Bones?" Tonia asked, looking down at the screen as she passed by, carrying a tray of test tubes.

Bones chuckled. "It's a joke - it's what he calls me," he tried to explain, taking the tray from her. "Where do you want these?"

"Wherever you want them, they're for you," she replied with a straight face. "So, doesn't anyone call you Leonard?"

"My mother did," he drawled, chuckling as he thought about it. "That's about it. Everyone else, it's either Doctor or Bones."

"Well, I like Leonard," she told him. "It's a nice name. Let me know if you need anything else, okay? Belis over there is going to make slides out of the samples for you."

"That would be great, thanks," he said to both Tonia and the young research assistant who was already preparing slides. Pulling his stool up to the microscope, he began to review the slides, transcribing his notes to the computer.

* * *

Jim transported to the surface of ARK-7 and was met at the transporter pad by David's great-aunt, Marjorie. "I'm so pleased to see you here, Captain," the older woman said as she shook his hand. "I was so afraid that you wouldn't be able to make it, or... oh, I don't know. It doesn't matter now, you're here and that's all that matters." She led him out of the research area to their quarters in the housing unit where the families lived. "I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't come," she said, as she let them inside the building.

The Marcus home was neat and tidy, filled with artifacts and souvenirs from their travels, the walls lined with photographs of a smiling woman and her son. Jim looked at one in particular, the love between them so evident it made him feel immediately like an outsider. He didn't know them, either of them, and here he was, expected to pick of the pieces and solve everyone's problem.

"David's in class right now," Marjorie told him, bringing him something to drink as they sat on the sofa. "We thought it would be best for him to continue his normal schedule as long as he could, until matters were settled. As I told you, it's only he and I now on Carol's side." She reached into her bag, pulling out a letter addressed to him. "I've been diagnosed with Sakuro's Disease," she told him, "and I must be returning to the hospital on Epsilon Canaris III as soon as I can to resume treatments."

"This was found with her will," she continued, handing it to him with a shaking hand. "Everything she had went to David," she added quietly. "There are provisions for him to be sent to a private school on Regula I, should that be your decision."

 

 _Jim,_

 _Well, if you're reading this, that means something's happened to me. I only hope that David's not still small - the one thing I worry most about is him being alone out there before he's old enough to really take care of himself._

 _I hope I made the right decision, not telling you. I know you'll be angry, but at the time it seemed like the best thing for everyone. When I found out I was pregnant I wasn't sure what to do, and by the time I'd made up my mind and came back home, you'd been sent off on your mission after saving us all. How was I going to saddle you with a child? We weren't going to get married, I knew that, and frankly didn't want it, so to me this made the most sense._

 _It may be selfish, too. I love him more than anything, and I like having him with me, not having to share. He's going to be a brilliant man when he grows up, and heaven help me, he reminds me of you so much. The older he gets, the more I see you in him._

 _I suspect he'll ask about you as he grows older. Right now my simple answers have sufficed, but he's going to want to know more one day. I hope I'm there to tell him, but if I'm not - just remind him that his mother loved him so very much._

 _Hope life has given you what you wanted,  
Carol _

 

The letter was dated three years prior. Jim folded it and tucked it inside his pocket. He tried to remember more about her, but he couldn't, and that made him feel terrible.

When he looked up, he found himself being evaluated by a pair of familiar-looking blue eyes. "Hello there," he said, putting on his friendliest smile.

The boy didn't say anything.

"I'm Jim," he added, wanting to make sure there was no confusion.

"I know that," the boy said, finally speaking. "You're my father."

"Yeah, I guess I am," he answered, "but you can call me Jim, if you want." This was his kid alright, down to the patented Kirk 'don't fuck with me' scowl. He knew then and there that he wouldn't be needing that sample for Spock.

"So, we're supposed to be getting to know each other here," Jim began. "Who should start?"

David sat silently, looking down at his feet.

"Alright," Jim continued, pressing on. "I'll go first. I'm thirty-five, I grew up in Iowa, and have been captain of the Enterprise for ten years. It's the flagship of the fleet," he told him, wondering why he trying so hard to impress this kid.

This felt like an interview, and upon reflection, that would have been the correct name for it.

"Your aunt tells me that you're really smart. What do you like to study?" he asked, curious.

"I like science," he said. "Mom said I'd be a good at medicine or something like that."

Jim chuckled at that, earning him another frown. "Oh no, I'm not laughing, its just that, well, my best friend, well, he's actually my husband, he's a doctor." By some unspoken agreement they rarely used the word 'husband', though neither would clarify if pressed on why it made them uncomfortable.

"You're married?" David asked.

"Yeah," Jim nodded, showing him the silver band on his finger. "I think you'll like him," he added, trying not to lose his temper as David rolled his eyes. "Okay, sport, your turn."

David looked at him. "What do you want to know."

"You got any hobbies?"

"I like to climb things," he said.

"What, like trees?" Jim asked.

David nodded. "And rocks, you know, like cliffs."

Jim raised an eyebrow. "What else."

"I've got a Gorokian toad," David added, the hint of a smile on his face. "His name is Kha'ped."

"Excellent," Jim replied, not entirely sure if that was excellent or not, but at least the kid was talking.

* * *

They talked more the next afternoon when David finished his classes. After lunch, David showed Jim around the research base. Jim could see that they were right - the kid was ridiculously smart, once he started talking. But every so often he'd go into shut-down mode, not wanting to say anything, and just looking sad and angry. Jim imagined that this was natural, but still - he didn't know what to do, other than just be there, so he tried his best to fill the empty spaces with some of their tamer adventures in space.

David's great-aunt joined them for dinner. "I'm glad to see that you two have hit it off," she told them. "I'll be honest, Captain, I was very worried that might not happen."

"I think we're making good progress," Jim said, looking over at David, who rolled his eyes again as he ate his dinner.

"That's good." She hesitated, then began talking. "I'll be needing to get back to the hospital soon for these treatments, or the next few months will be very uncomfortable for me. I wish I could take care of this young man," she said, her eyes lighting on David. "He and his mother were my only family and it breaks my heart that he's all alone now."

David's face froze at those words, and he looked scared.

Jim's heart broke in two pieces. "He's not alone," he said quietly. "He's got me." Looking over at David, he gave him what he hoped was a reassuring smile, the one he would see Bones give patients in sickbay. "He's got me if he'll have me."

"Captain, can he go on your ship with you?" Marjorie asked.

"Not long-term, not yet," Jim admitted. "We're not equipped for families. But I'm making arrangements. I've got family on Earth, and if they can't take him, then..." he shrugged, "then I'll quit, or I'll find another ship where I can have him with me. I always find a way," he said to David, a hint of swagger in his tone until he looked into those bright blue eyes, filled with tears.

"It's gonna be alright," he told the boy, standing up and giving him a hug. "I promise." David leaned into the hug and Jim felt his heart pounding in a way that it never did on board his ship. _Fuck, this is it_ , he told himself. _No going back now._

* * *

 **Starfleet Message: URGENT COMMUNIQUE - CONFIDENTIAL to KIRK, JAMES T, Captain USS Enterprise on Research Station ARK-7:**

The research station we are currently attempting to evacuate has come under fire. A nearby Cardassian ship was also destroyed, presumably the work of the Romulans. Awaiting further instructions regarding use of force. -Spock.

 

 **Starfleet Message: URGENT COMMUNIQUE - CONFIDENTIAL to SPOCK, Commander USS Enterprise:**

Do not, repeat, do not leave research station unprotected. Get them off if you can, do not fire unless fired upon. I'm arranging transport to Enterprise, expect me in twelve hours.

 

 _Fuck_ , he thought to himself after reading the message from Spock and sending his reply. He'd expected to have more time to get to know David and get his things gathered so he could join them, but if the Enterprise was heading into battle... no, David would be safer here on the station for a few more days.

Jim went looking for David to tell him he was leaving, but the kid was no where to be found inside, so he took a quick walk around the station and the grounds outside, trying to find him.

"Ouch," he growled, bringing his hand to his head. A rock lay at his feet, and as he bent down to pick it up, he saw another one whiz by, missing him by a few feet. When he looked up, he caught sight of someone scampering from the roof of the housing quarters. Jim twitched, wondering if his suspicions were correct. Sneaking quietly around back, he climbed up the walls using the scaffolding and an open window, pulling himself onto the roof.

Sure enough, there was a small blond head ducking up and down, peeking up when people wandered by and tossing rocks at them.

"Cut that out," he called out, not surprised at the half-scowl the boy sent back at him. It was a familiar look, one that graced his face often when he was about this kid's age. That thought sobered him up - the last thing he wanted was to be compared to his step-father and his heavy hand.

"How did you get up here?" Jim asked, scooting closer to the edge. From where he was sitting, he felt it was easily thirty-five feet to the ground.

"This is my spot," David answered, as if that made all the sense to him in the world.

"You can't just throw rocks at people."

David shrugged, as if he didn't think much of that answer.

"Look, David, I know this is a lot for you to process," he began, stopping when he saw the look on David's face; a look that said he'd heard that sort of dispassionate 'you'll be alright' babble ever since his mother's death. "I'm sorry I haven't met you before now, cause you seem like a great kid. And even though we just met, I think it's going to work out. I'm here to make you that promise. I'm not going to screw this up," he told him.

David evaluated his answer. "Alright," he said, giving Jim a look that said he wasn't sure he believed him, but he was at least willing to give it a try.

"Now, I've got some bad news, and I hate telling you this, but I have to go, right now." David's eyes flashed hot, as if he was thinking that after all he'd said, Jim was leaving him too. "This isn't what I had planned, but the mission's in trouble, the one I was telling you about, with my ship - and I've got to get to her." Jim had never felt worse in his life. "I need you to understand that I wouldn't go if this wasn't literally life and death."

David looked down, a rock in his hand, but this time he just tossed it to the ground. "Are you going to be in danger?"

Jim's heart broke fresh at that. The boy had lost _everything_ , and now here he was worried about losing Jim. Suddenly the enormity of it all seemed to settle on him like a ton of bricks. "It's going to get a bit rough," he admitted. "But it's the best ship in the fleet with the best crew in the universe. And I always win," Jim told him, turning to face him.

"You do?"

"I'm Jim Kirk," he said, laughing at himself. That meant nothing to this kid, totally unimpressed by that pronouncement. "And I'm also the best there is."

A roll of the eye. "Okay, you watch," Jim poked him in the shoulder. "I'm gonna go out there and kick some Romulan ass, and I'll be seeing you in about a week, okay? Then we're heading for Earth."

"Am I going to stay there?" he asked curiously.

"Yeah, my ship's got three months of leave coming up, and we're heading there. Not sure about after, but that should give us time to get to know each other, figure out the next step." Jim ran his hand over David's soft blond hair, silky hair like he had when he was this age. His childhood hadn't been easy, either, but there was no way Jim was going to let this kid hurt anymore than he had to. "Hey, just so you know, I'm going to take good care of you, and that's a promise." He pulled him next to him, one arm slung around the small shoulders. "I love you, alot."

"You don't even know me," David said, unconsciously sliding closer to Jim.

"I know," he answered. "Crazy, isn't it?" He gave him a kiss on the top of his head. "Now, can we go inside now? It's too high up here, and I'm afraid of falling."

"No, you're not," David said with a sniffle and the smallest chuckle.

"Yeah, I am," Jim laughed, as they made their way inside.

* * *

"Doctor McCoy, you have a video message coming in onscreen."

 _Jim?_ he wondered. It had been almost two weeks since he'd heard from him, and he was beginning to worry. They'd managed to isolate the needed antibodies and create an antidote to the virus, and now they were putting the finishing touches on a vaccine to prevent it from ever reoccurring. The mission was a success, and Bones was ready to go home.

"Patch it through to my office," Tonia called out from the other side of the lab. "You can have some privacy there."

Jim's face appeared on the viewer. He had a laceration on his forehead that looked a few days old, one that Bones could already tell hadn't seen the inside of the sickbay. "Hey Bones," Jim said with a tired smile. "God, its good to see you."

"What happened to your face?" Bones asked, his voice instantly gruff.

Jim shrugged. "Romulans are fucking liars," he answered. "No surprise there, right? Should have seen it coming, but-" Jim just shrugged. Just from listening to him Bones could tell he'd probably suffered from at least one broken rib.

"Has Christine fixed you up?"

"Yeah, she did a bang-up job," Jim nodded.

 _Liar..._ "Any other injuries?"

"A few, nothing really significant, Chapel's taking care of it." Jim's face smirked in that hard, bitter way he'd developed recently. "They got the worse end of it. Don't need any doctors on what's left of that ship."

 _Great_ , he thought to himself. "So, how did it go with David?" Bones asked. "How did meeting him go?"

"It was good," Jim said with a smile. "I'll tell you more when I see you, okay?"

"Have you made a decision about what to do with him?"

"Still thinking about it," Jim sighed. "We're going to pick him up and take him back to Earth for the time being, until I figure out-"

"You can't have him on the ship, not when you're getting busted up, not if there's battles and-"

"Yeah, I know," Jim interrupted tiredly. "I'm not stupid."

It was the same fight. Bones knew it by heart now.

"Alright, whatever," Jim said when Bones didn't respond. "We'll be in transporter range tomorrow, is that amenable or should we send a shuttle?

"Beam me up, Scotty," Bones retorted.

"Fine then. I'll see you tomorrow," Jim said, Bones watching as Jim reached for the screen on his side and flipped it off. No 'miss you', or 'love you' or nothing. Just off.

"Asshole," he said to himself, turning around and spotting Tonia in the doorway.

"Sorry," she said. "I thought you were done."

"It's nothing," he told her. "Don't worry about it."

"Want to talk about it?"

Bones shook his head. "Nothing to tell."

Tonia frowned. "How about some dinner then, and some company? A group of us are going out, celebrate the end of the project. Love for you to join us."

It was on the tip of his tongue to say no, but something about that conversation made him change his mind. Yeah, that would be nice, get out of here, celebrate their success. And later that night as he finished packing his things for the trip home tomorrow, he could honestly say he'd had a good time, talking medicine with this group of highly professional people. In his head he'd always pictured himself doing something like this - research, running a lab, being his own boss. Not flying around in some tin box in space. Not always fighting to get his way...

Not that'd ever give up what he had with Jim, not for anything. _Jim_... he missed Jim more than he ever imagined possible, but Christ, he was tired of the fighting, always being the one to remind Jim to be practical. It got old sometimes, always being teased for being old and grumpy, but dammit, that's who he was when they met - Jim knew that, Jim liked that. _Loved_ that, he had said, but now, its a tired mantra he hears over and over again.

* * *

"Dr McCoy," one of the researchers called to him as he sat in the mess hall, "there's a message for you." A standard comm from Uhura: Enterprise delayed, will be in transport range in twenty-four hours. Bones tried not to be hurt that it wasn't Jim who sent it, but he's got other things to do. Captain things, never mind that they're goddamned married or bonded or whatever the hell they are.

Sitting back down, he pushed his food away, suddenly not hungry.

"Leonard?"

"Hey there," he nodded at Tonia, looking down at him with concern.

"You alright?" Tonia asked. She sat down across from him. "I wanted to thank you again for all your help. There's no way we could have gotten the vaccine ready to go without you here. You saved the lives of the people here, and our whole planet's livelihood."

"I just helped. You guys," Bones started. "You've got a great team here."

"Still, I wish I could make it up to you, even just a little." She took a deep breath. "I heard you're not leaving until tomorrow, right?" When he nodded, she continued. "You are all done here, been here all of three weeks and I don't even think you've seen the best parts of this place. C'mon," she told him. "We're going to play tourist. Please?"

Bones looked over at his work area, and it was clean, spotless even. As he'd expected to be leaving that morning, he was done. And dammit, it was nice to be wanted, even just like this. "Alright," he drawled, grinning at her. "You win. Let's go."

It had been so long since someone wanted to spend time like this with him that he felt guilty at the pure joy of being wanted, even in a platonic way. Tonia put him in her personal transport and took him up into the mountains, showing him the view from the scenic point at the top. The two moons were clearly visible, even in the middle of the day, and he found himself so mesmerized by the view that he hadn't noticed her pulling out a bag with some fruit and sandwiches.

"You're feeding me too?" he laughed. "Be careful, a guy could get used to this."

"You should be treated like this all the time, doc," she told him, looking out over the mountains. "That big one over there is called Mount Petrovsky, named after the first family to colonize this rock."

He took another bite, digesting her comments. She'd say things like that, that he should be treated better, that he deserved more and better things. It was nice to hear, but probably not the most professional discussion they could be having.

Still, it was nice hearing...

"And that forest was planted by the Barrows family, my ancestors. No one thought this soil would accept plant life. But look at that," Tonia grinned, clearly proud of that forest.

"They are lovely trees," he told her, a sarcastic note to his voice.

"It's better up close," she told him, and they got back into the transport and headed down the mountainside toward the forest. Trees larger than Bones had ever seen, even the redwoods back near San Fransisco, trees that made him feel like a dwarf. He tried to wrap his arms around one and laughed when he couldn't. "Let's do it together," Tonia laughed, taking one of his hands and standing on the opposite side of the tree. "Nope," she said when the two of them couldn't encircle the enormous stump. "We'd need another person."

"One more place," she told him as they got back into the transport. "My favorite spot."

They drove another hour, music playing in the transport lulling him. He couldn't remember the last time he'd spent so much time doing nothing. Maybe their last shore leave five years ago, when their hovercar busted in some hick town in Montana and they had to wait a day and a half for the parts to arrive. Vacations with Jim tended to be adventurous and eventful. Jim Kirk was not one for sitting still and looking at the mountains, or a tree, or some water, he thought, as she pulled up in front of a beach, the water tinged pinkish from the sunset.

Getting out, Tonia led him to an area where boulders dotted the landscape. "I love this spot," she said. "You can sit here and even when the tide comes in, you won't get wet." The first rock had a bit of a slope so they moved to another one, getting their shoes wet in the process. He had on boots, but her shoes were ruined. Still, she laughed at it. "Serves me right for saying that," she shook her head.

The evening set in, the sky darkening, and soon the stars began to appear. She pointed out constellations to him, and he tried to see what she was telling him, where she pointed. "I'm not clever enough to make an animal out of a set of dots. Clouds maybe," he shrugged, chuckling to himself. "But not dots."

"You're not looking carefully enough, Leonard," Tonia said, scooting closer. Tucking herself nearly under his arm, she pointed up at the sky, until her face was close to his. He looked down and saw how dangerously close she was, but he didn't say anything, not even when she lifted her face and gave him a gentle kiss.

He didn't return it, but he didn't pull away either. Leaning back, she looked to the water. "I shouldn't have done that," she said. "I'm sorry."

"It's alright," he told her.

"No," she shook her head. "It's not. But I'm glad I did it anyway," she told him, eyes still on the horizon. "I've come about as close to falling in love with you as a person could get these past few weeks, and I knew that you were married and I knew that you'd be leaving so I just wanted to have one day with you. I thought that would be enough." Tonia looked up at him again, then turned away, her eyes bright and shining. "Huge mistake on my part, cause now I know how wonderful you are and how good it would have been."

"Tonia," he said quietly.

"Don't," she told him. "Just - don't say it." Taking a deep breath, she stood, holding her hand out to him. "Let me get you back to your room."

The drive back was quiet, only the music on the radio to distract him from his thoughts. She gave his arm a squeeze in the hall before they parted for their separate rooms, still not having said anything else - every time he tried to say something she cut him off with a look.

 

Lying in bed later that night he stared at the ceiling when he heard the soft knocks on his door. It's her, of course he knows it's her, as surely as if she'd told him she was coming.

Bones looked at the door, saw himself standing up and moving toward it as if he were going to open it. His hand reached up to the panel before he stopped himself. _No_ , he told himself. _No..._ Jim's face floats through his mind, and he turned around and lay back down in bed.

He lay there awake for a long time thinking about what almost happened. What he _almost_ let happen.

She wasn't there the next morning when he left. Some of the other members of the team saw him off, wished him well, and he returned their goodbyes before feeling the pull of the transporter sending him back to the Enterprise.

* * *

Jim's waiting for him on the other side.

"Hi," Jim grinned, giving him a hug when he stepped off the pad. "Glad to see you," he said.

"Me too," Bones answered, pressing their heads together, as close to a demonstration as affection as they made in public. "You got some time right now?" he asked.

Jim nodded. "Yeah," grabbing the second bag and heading back to their rooms.

It didn't take long for them to get undressed. _This was always good_ , Bones thought. Even when the talking got bad, they always had _this_.

They spent a few hours together, touching, kissing, tasting, but strangely not saying anything, not even the light banter that sometimes punctuated their lovemaking. Almost as if each man was afraid of saying the wrong thing, they looked at each other, smiles on their faces that couldn't hide the shadows in their eyes.

* * *

Bones spent the entire next day reorganizing the sickbay - Chapel had staged a near coup, remaking it in her image while he was gone. While her organization skills were better than his, he could admit to himself, it was his medical department, dammit, and if he'd had wanted the medications alphabetized then he would have done it himself.

He caught up with Jim as they made their way back to their rooms for dinner. "Glad to be back?" Jim smirked.

Bones rolled his eyes. "That woman is a menace," he said, only half-joking. "I told her if she wanted to be a doctor so badly, then she needed to go to med school and do it."

"And her response was?"

"I think she's actually thinking about it," Bones admitted as they entered their rooms.

"Well, she's a smart lady - hey, speaking of," Jim said, taking off his boots and sitting on the bed, "what's the story with Tonia Barrows?"

Bones froze. Swallowing, he looked over at Jim. "What do you mean?" he asked quietly.

"She's withdrawn her application for Enterprise," Jim said, laying down and sighing. "I had sent her paperwork in, because you said she was good, but it came back today, refused. She doesn't want us. I was just wondering if she'd heard something bad about it here, or what changed her mind."

"I don't know, Jim," Bones said, his face dropping. This was all his fault.

"You didn't make it sound terrible, did you?" Jim joked, catching the look on Bones' face. "What, did you two not get along?" he asked.

"No, we got along fine," Bones retorted.

"Then why doesn't she want on board?"

 _Dammit..._ "I don't know, why don't you-" he was about to suggest that Jim ask her, if he wanted to know so bad, then thought again about suggesting that. "Look, I don't know," he repeated harshly.

Jim watched his face carefully. Bones was a lousy liar. "No, I think you do. What's the big secret?" he asked, his voice lowering.

Bones stood up, pacing as he ran a hand over the back of his neck. "She likes me."

"She likes you?" Jim raised an eyebrow. "What, are we twelve years old, what does that mean, she likes you?"

Bones sat silent. This wasn't any of Jim's business, it really wasn't, and there was no way he was going to come out of this sounding blameless. "She developed feelings for me when I was planetside," he finally spat out.

"And she told you this?" Jim asked.

Bones nodded, twisting his mouth.

"And these feelings were strong enough that she'd turn down a Science officer position on the flagship of the Federation?" The look on Jim's face was indescribable - as if he didn't know whether to laugh or scream. "What were you two doing down there?" he finally asked.

"I didn't do anything," Bones answered.

Jim looked at him.

"What?"

"Did anything happen between you too?" Jim asked.

Bones hesitated, just a fraction of a second, but it was enough. "Did you fuck her?" Jim asked.

"No," Bones said sharply.

"Did you want to?"

Bones stared at him, as if he couldn't believe this was happening.

"I don't fucking believe you," Jim said. "Do you know what I'm going through up here, and you're fucking around planetside with some tramp."

"It wasn't like that, and no, I don't know what you're going through, cause you won't talk to me about it, you ass." Bones made fists with his hands, dropping them to his sides as he stood there. "And I'm tired of asking you to let me in on whatever decisions you've made that are going to change our lives."

"No, you are not turning this on me, not now. You tell me, then what was it like down there? You wanna fill me in?"

"No, not really," he retorted in a sarcastic way that he knew drove Jim crazy.

"Fuck you, Bones."

"That would be nice, seeing as it hasn't been happening much lately."

"Seeing as what? Oh, you're missing the sex?" Jim's laugh was sharp as a knife as he stood. "This is great. I'm the one who's supposed to be the Starfleet whore, but its the holier-than-thou doctor who's out dabbling with the medical staff. Not getting it from me so you're trolling elsewhere?" His blue eyes were boring a hole in Bones. "What the fuck happened down there, Leonard?" he yelled louder, stepping in front of Bones, keeping him from leaving the room.

Bones pushed him into the wall, holding him by the shoulders. "Cut it out, Jim."

"You want to be with a woman? Is that it?"

"I just want to be wanted, how about that, you ass?" Bones said, letting go of Jim's arms. "All you do is think about yourself and your problems and to hell with the rest of us."

And that was it. Jim punched him as hard as he could.

It wasn't completely unexpected - Bones thought he might have gone too far with that last comment, but he was sick and tired of all of this. Rubbing his chin, he just shook his head at Jim. "I'm done with this."

"Where are you going?" Jim yelled as Bones pushed him out of the way and headed out of the bedroom.

"What do you care?" Bones asked, turning and looking at Jim. "I mean really, what do you care..." Gathering his PADD and his medical bag, Bones stormed out of the room.

Jim watched that happen as if in slow motion. "Fuck!" he yelled, punching a wall. He stood for a long time watching the door, as if watching it would make Bones come back. When it didn't, he went to the replicator and made himself an icepack for his swelling hand, sat down at their table and got really, really drunk.

* * *

The Enterprise was really just a village, and it didn't take long for word to spread that McCoy was sleeping in the CMO quarters that had been unoccupied for seven years. Eyebrows were lifted and wagers were made as to how long this would last, but after nearly a week of no changes, the mood began to shift from one of amusement to one of concern, because in the end, the Enterprise was really a family.

Attempts made by worried parties tended to fall on deaf ears, though, as neither man wanted to talk about their problems. Jim spent most evenings in Engineering with Scotty, who alone among the crew didn't ask a single question about Bones, his only interest seeming to be re-amplifying dilithium crystals, instead of replacing them. Bones split his time between the sickbay and Stellar Cartography, if only to have someplace to go that wasn't his empty cabin.

 

With one week to go until the leave, it seemed as if an impasse was reached until Bones appeared on the bridge. "Can I see you in your office," he asked, the entire bridge crew holding their breath.

"Mr Sulu, you have the con," Jim said, walking toward his ready room. Once the door was closed behind Bones, he turned toward him. "Yes?" he asked brusquely.

"Permission to disembark early, Captain," Bones asked stiffly.

Jim just stared at him, biting back the urge to ask if he had a hot date to make.

"It's only a week, and I've got the time-"

"Where you going, Leonard?" Jim asked, his voice not nearly as sharp or mean as he wanted it. In fact, it sounded close to gentle.

"I just need some time, Jim," Bones answered back softly. "I've got to get off this ship before I do something or say something I'm going to regret."

Jim watched, wanting to step closer but he couldn't. Not yet. "David is shuttling in tomorrow," Jim said. "You should stay and meet him."

Bones shook his head. "There's a shuttle leaving tonight, if I make it I can catch a ship to Earth in the morning. But this is good, about David," he added, one step toward Jim. "It'll give you a chance to talk to him, get to know him without me around."

"He needs to get to know you, Bones," Jim replied.

"He needs to get to know you first," Bones answered. "I'll be around when that's done."

"Will you?" Bones looked up at him quickly. "Where are you going?" Jim asked, repeating his question from earlier.

"Don't know yet," he said, taking the second step toward him. "I'll let you know when I get there, though."

"Do that," Jim whispered, reaching out for Bones' arm, pulling at it until Bones was pressed against his body. They stood close, holding each other stiffly. _It shouldn't feel this awkward_ , Jim thought, his eyes closed so they wouldn't tear up. He swallowed hard. "Be careful."

"That's my line," Bones answered, putting a soft kiss on the side of Jim's head. "I'll see you soon," he whispered before letting go and turning to the door.

The door opened, Bones standing in the doorway when Jim called out, "Doctor McCoy?"

Bones turned. "Yes, Captain?"

But he couldn't say it. Jim wanted to tell him to stay, to come home. He wanted to tell him that he loved him no matter what, and to be safe and careful and to not worry about the shuttle, it was perfectly safe, and a hundred other things. But none of them would leave his mouth, so he just looked at Bones, standing there not ten feet away, feeling like the distance between them was measured in miles. "Are you going alone?" he heard himself finally say.

A long moment passed before Bones turned and headed toward the lift, a long moment where Jim wondered if he really wanted the answer to that question. _Way to fuck that up_ , he thought to himself as he put his head on his desk and counted to a hundred before heading out to the bridge.

* * *

But he couldn't worry too long about his own problems - David arrived the next afternoon on a shuttle, looking much younger than his ten years as he held on tightly to his travel bag and cage holding a small toad. Jim's stomach flip-flopped as he watched the boy disembark and walk toward him. "Hi there," he said, giving him a one-armed hug.

"Hello," David answered, his eyes darting around as he took in the size of the shuttlebay. Jim noted that several boxes were also being unloaded - Carol Marcus' possessions, to be kept in storage in case David ever needed to get into them.

Jim took the bag David had carried so the boy could hold his pet with both hands. Making their way to the Captain's quarters, Jim nodded at each crew member who greeted him, David watching in a sort of wide-eyed wonder.

"And here we are," he said, tapping his code into the door, opening with a quiet 'whoosh'. Following David inside, Jim took a deep breath. Without Bones this past week, Jim hadn't spent much time here, so walking in he felt his heart drop. "Bones had to head to Earth early," Jim said to David with a false brightness in his voice. "He wanted to stay and meet you, but he'll catch up with us once we get there."

"Where should I put him?" David asked, looking down at his toad and then back up at Jim.

Jim chuckled. "Anywhere you want. Make yourself at home." Jim took the bag to his bedroom. He'd had a cot brought in for David to sleep on for the days they'd be traveling to Earth and space dock. "Okay, time for the tour. Food synthesizer, in case you get hungry. Bedroom, cot, bathroom," he continued pointing out the different locations. "Computer terminal. So, I'm off-shift right now. Anything you want to do, or did you want to rest?" David wrinkled his nose. Jim put his hands up. "I don't know about ten-year olds. What do you feel like doing right now?"

"Can I see the bridge?" David asked, looking up at Jim.

Jim gave him his brightest smile. "You bet. C'mon, let me show you the ship."

The Enterprise didn't often have civilian guests, and children were even more rare, so everyone who saw the captain and his son stopped and gave them a smile and a 'hello'. Those who needed to know about the situation - namely the senior staff and medical clinic - were already informed about David's arrival and his relationship to Jim, avoiding the need to explain how Jim suddenly came to have a child.

Spock had the bridge as they exited the lift. "Captain," he nodded his head at Jim. "We did not expect you this afternoon."

"Just giving David the Captain's tour," Jim grinned. "Everyone, this is David Marcus." David was introduced individually to everyone, his eyes moving over the computer terminals and panels, watching as the crew worked seamlessly together. Sulu explained their heading and what those numbers meant, Chekov explaining the duties of the Tactical officer, describing the strength of Enterprises' shields and the sort of weapons they had on board.

"Hey there." David turned toward the Communications center. "I'm Nyota. I'll be hanging out with you in the mornings while your dad is on duty, if that's alright." She gave him a bright smile, one which David returned. Jim mouthed a 'thanks' to her as he put one hand on David's shoulder.

"What are you doing?" he asked, then listened carefully as she explained how she was listening to communications from the shuttle he'd arrived on as it prepared to leave. She gave him an earpiece so he could listen in on the conversation. "Thanks," he told her when they'd gotten the shuttle safely off.

"Anytime, David," she told him, watching as he left her area and made his way back toward Jim, standing in the center of the room, talking quietly to Sulu.

"Is that-"

Jim laughed. "Yeah, that's it." He bent down low into David's ear. "Want to sit in it?"

David bit his lip, then giving Jim a nod, jumped into the captain's chair. "Cool," he said, his hands sliding over the controls.

"Captain," Spock said, and all eyes turned toward the Vulcan. "Now that Mr. Marcus has arrived and his shuttle has departed, I believe it is time for a course correction to be made in order to get us to our destination more efficiently."

Jim quirked an eyebrow. "You don't say?" he grinned.

Spock lifted his eyebrow in return. "Perhaps the acting Captain would like to issue the order."

"That's a good idea," Jim agreed, trying to keep the smile from breaking out on his face. "Go ahead," he said to David, still sitting in his chair.

"Me?" David looked surprised. "But I don't know-"

"Say 'Alpha quadrant, sector zero zero one'," Sulu whispered to the boy.

"Um, Alpha quadrant, sector zero zero one."

"Course correction, alpha quadrant, sector zero zero one ready sir." Sulu replied sharply.

Nothing happened for a moment. "Say 'engage'," Chekov whispered loudly.

David nodded, grinning. "Engage."

"Engaging," Sulu replied, fingers tapping across his screen. "We should be there in six days."

"Cool," David answered, looking back up at Jim, who responded with a "Very cool."

* * *

The next few days passed uneventfully, for which Jim was grateful. He'd work in the mornings, then head to his cabin as soon as he could. Normally he loved being on the bridge, in his chair, but with David on board, it had taken a bit of juggling to make sure that he wasn't alone for long periods of time.

Thankfully Nyota had volunteered a few mornings, so Jim didn't have to inconvenience too many people by not being available, but there were some things administratively that had to be signed off by the captain.

He entered his quarters and found them playing three-dimensional chess.

"Who's winning?" he asked, laughing as the scowl on David's face. "Oh," he replied, making a sympathetic face. "Why don't you get this all put away while I talk to Nyota, okay?"

They watched as the boy began putting the pieces carefully in their protective case. David had enjoyed the game enough to convince Jim to take it with them on their shore leave. "I can't thank you enough for all your help."

"Please," she replied. "He's a great kid. Can't believe that he's yours," she joked.

"Me neither," he answered, eyes following the boy. "I mean, he's handsome, brilliant, and well-spoken... wait a minute, that does sounds familiar, now that you mention it." Jim chuckled as she smacked him in the shoulder. It was nice to laugh again. His days were busy, and being with David was a whole other full-time job. But the nights - the nights were when he thought about Bones, about how he left the ship to 'think about things' or some bullshit like that. Jim tried not to lay awake all night, wondering why he hadn't heard a word from Bones since he left.

But days were too busy to worry about that. At least that's what he told himself when sitting across from Nyota, looking at him with pity in her eyes. Hell no, that wasn't going to do...

"So, gonna have kids of your own?" he wondered, enjoying the look of surprise in her eyes.

"What, are you the poster child for parenthood now?" she retorted, then sighed. "Actually," she began, "we've talked about it."

"Really?" Jim was suddenly all ears.

"Yeah," she admitted. "I mean, it's going to be a huge change for us. I couldn't stay working here," her face fell at that. "Not as long as families can't come on board."

Jim bit his lip. "It's just not feasible on a Constitution-class heavy cruiser. We're going into uncharted waters, and there's no way we could guarantee their safety."

"You don't think kids on board might make for better crew?"

"They might," he admitted, "but-" Jim shook his head. "We're not prepared for that, not yet. We'd need a whole new level of organization here, a schoolroom, provisions for children or civilians..." Jim sighed. "Maybe one day, but not now." His face showed how conflicted he was by that as his eyes followed David. It had only been a few days but already he knew he was going to miss being with him once he'd left him back home.

"So, where does that leave you?" he asked her.

"I don't know," she looked serious at him. "I'd like to get started one of these days, but we can't as long as we're here." She chuckled. "It's not as huge a time factor for him as it is for me, either. At any rate, we've signed on for another five years. After that, we might get shaking on it."

"I'd hate to lose you," he told her honestly.

"I'd hate to leave," she admitted. "I worked so hard to get here, but," she shrugged, "until someone finds a way to make you guys have the babies, those are the breaks."

"Now I'm sad," Jim said, his bottom lip pouting. "I don't want you to go."

"You are such a dork," she laughed. "Don't worry, you've got me another five years."

"And Spock? Is he ready to be a daddy?"

She shrugged. "I think so. It's hard to tell sometimes when he wants something or when he's making the decision that makes the most sense. I know he doesn't want to leave me behind, whatever happens, and that means leaving Enterprise."

"You should do it, if it's what you need to do. Being together is more important that being here."

Nyota got quiet. "Have you heard from Leonard?"

He shook his head, looking away from the fucking look of pity in her eyes.

Nyota lay one hand on top of his and squeezed. "Let me know if you need any help with David," she told him before calling out her farewells to the young boy and leaving.

* * *

Jim went into the bedroom where David was looking at some of Bones' old medical books. "You like that stuff, huh?" Jim asked, sitting on the bed next to him.

"Kinda," he said. "I was trying to remember some of the names of the body parts. And these books are cool," he fingered the pages. "My mom had some like them, they were in her family."

 _Everything was 'cool'_ , Jim laughed to himself. "Well, when you meet Bones you guys can talk all about the body. He'll talk your head off about diseases and crap like that. Oh," Jim winced. "I probably shouldn't say 'crap', huh?"

"Mom would say 'crap'," David laughed sadly. "Sometimes she said worse."

Jim took a deep breath. "You miss her?" he said, putting an arm around the boy's shoulder.

David nodded, laying down on the bed, looking up at the ceiling. "You miss Bones?" he asked.

Jim lay down as well, sighing. "Yeah."

* * *

Jim didn't know what David was more excited about - being on Earth for the first time since he was a toddler or being on a motorcycle. Even though he was going well below any posted speed limit he saw, it felt like the ride of his life, the small arms wrapped around him, feeling David laugh and squeeze tight with each turn.

Soon Jim pulled into the old familiar road that led to his mom's house. Even now, he couldn't think of it as his home. Helping David with his helmet, Jim propped the bike as it slowly rested on the ground. One arm around David, they made their way up toward the house.

"Hello there, Jimmy." A older blonde woman with a familiar look walked down the porch steps toward where Jim and the boy stood. Winona wrapped her arms around her son, looking up at him. "You look tired," she said, touching his face lovingly. "And who is this handsome young gentleman?" she asked, looking down at David.

"I'm David Marcus," he said, holding out his hand. Jim chuckled.

"Of course you are," she said, taking the hand. "And look how polite. You could learn something from him, Jim," Winona teased gently. "Someone's taught this boy some manners, I can see that."

"My mom," David answered, looking up as if to gauge her reaction to that.

"She must have been very special," Win said, bending down to his level, a sad smile on her face. "I wish I had known her," she said, looking back up at Jim for a moment, then back at David. "But I just know she must have been very proud of you." David nodded a little, looking down at his feet. "Jimmy, take those bags inside while David and I go and see if the cookies are cool enough to eat, alright?"

* * *

After he'd put the bags in the guest room, Jim joined his mother on the porch, sitting on the steps as she munched on a cookie, watching as David played in the yard. "You should sell this place," he told her as he picked up three cookies from the plate. "You don't even farm anymore."

"I like the quiet," she said, looking out at the empty fields. "And it's good to have some room for a boy to run around." He looked over at David, chasing a fat golden retriever and tossing a stick at it. "He's hurting so badly, that poor baby. What about you?" she asked, running a hand over his head. "My baby is hurting too, I think. This all been too much?"

"I had no idea about him," he said to his mother. "Not a clue." Jim sighed. "Why wouldn't she tell me?" he asked, looking at her, looking for some answers to that question.

"I don't know, my love."

"I've missed ten years of his life," he added grimly.

"Jim," she replied, "in all likelihood you'd have missed those years anyway, being up in space."

"Still," he kicked at the wooden steps. "I should have known."

"Should have, could have... let that go," Winona told him, looking him in the eyes, "and focus on that little boy over there. He's lost everything."

Jim caught the haunted look in his mother's eyes. "What's that like?" he asked, voicing a question he'd always wanted to ask, but hadn't had the courage.

She was surprised at the question. _Maybe he is learning_ , she thought to herself. "No one can help you deal with loss. You just have to bear it and hope that tomorrow it will hurt less than today." Turning back to Jim, she smiled. "Then you hope the day after hurts less than that and then even less the next day, and maybe one day it will all be gone."

"Is it gone for you?"

"No," she admitted. "But today was better than yesterday. And I didn't lose everything, I had you, my beautiful shining star, and I had little Sam, though I didn't take care of you two as well as I should have."

"Mom," he began.

"No, that's a conversation for another day," she said, wiping a tear from her face. "Today is about that precious creature over there getting sweaty and dirty. You have a son, Jim, a beautiful son," she told him with a smile. "My God, he looks like you - another devil with an angel's face." She turned back to Jim, her eyes moist. "So much like your father you are." She shook her head, laughing. "You two look like you're getting along."

"We've gotten over the worst part, I think. I hope, anyway," he admitted. "It's not easy. I don't know what I'm doing."

"I know," she replied. "But you're the parent now, and its not about you. It's about him and his hurt, his loss. He's lost his entire world, and now there's just you. Well, you and Leonard, I suppose. How's he handling this?"

Jim was silent for a long time. "We're going through a rough patch right now," he admitted. "He's taking a little time to sort through his thoughts."

"Thoughts? About what?" she asked, instantly concerned.

"About us, I suppose."

"Is it because of-" she pointed to David.

"No," he leaned back. "We were having problems before we found out about him. Just typical stuff, I guess, falling into a bit of a rut. Things getting dull and routine," he shrugged. "I don't know, I didn't know that was a bad thing. But he doesn't- I don't know if I can trust him," he admitted to her, and himself.

"You going to make it work?"

"I-" he did, Jim _wanted_ it to work but not if this was going to happen again. Maybe Bones really did want someone else, maybe he wanted a woman.

Maybe he'd just finally gotten sick and tired of him.

"Jim," she took his hand. "I want you to ask yourself... what would happen if you woke up tomorrow and he was gone. Not left you, but gone."

Jim's hand tightened around hers.

"Because sometimes, people wake up and they have everything they could possibly want and in the blink of an eye it's taken away, gone forever. Look at me. Look at him," she sighed. "I don't know what happened between you two, and I don't want to know. But let me say this - right or wrong, I'd forgive a lot of things to have George back for just one more day." Her eyes were bright but the smile on her face was hard and bitter. "Life's not fair, and if you don't keep the ones you love close, you're going to regret it when they're gone."

He looked over the empty fields. He didn't say anything, but... she was right. He wanted to make it better. There were things that he'd let slip, and things that Bones had stopped doing. It was both of them that let this relationship stagnate, and it would take both of them to get it going again - but they could get it working again, of that he was certain.

Just knowing that made him feel a little better. "Thanks Mom," he said, leaning over to give her a one-armed hug.

She hugged him back tightly. "No, thank you, Jimmy, for bringing David here. I appreciate you giving me the chance to spend time with my grandson." Her face looked young again in the dying light of the day, but that sadness that lingered around her sometimes was there. "I like to think I didn't do so bad last time with you boys, but we both know that's not entirely true."

They didn't talk about Frank anymore, not since his mother had divorced him back when Jim was a teenager, but the damage of that toxin in their house had been done. "I'm just glad that things are better now with you and me," was all she would say about that.

"How's Sam?" Jim asked.

"He's good," she said, turning to him and smiling. "Came to see me last Christmas, brought his family." Sam had taken the brunt of Frank's abuse, and had distanced himself from all of them. It was nice hearing that he was coming around again. "His youngest is about David's age." She turned back to the picture of the small boy running in and out of the old corn plants, the ones that grew despite no one tending them. "Jim, I know you probably didn't have many options," she said, "but I am glad you trust me enough with him. I'm going to do it right this time," she said.

"There isn't anyone I trust more," he told her. _And it wasn't entirely terrible, growing up here_ , he told himself as he looked around as the sun was setting over the flat land. The air smelled clean, fresh, like sunshine and grass.

"And you?" she looked over at him.

"We're signing on for another five years," Jim answered.

"David will be fifteen," she reminded him. "Might get permission by that time to take him with you."

"Could enter the Academy young, too, or one of those prep schools. I guess it depends what he wants to do." He shook his head. "There's still so much about him I don't know about."

"Well, you've got some time right now," she reminded him. "And he'll be fine here, I promise you," she said as she leaned next to him, one arm slung around him as if he were the ten-year old, and not a grown-man.

* * *

It was three more days before Jim heard from Bones.

Jim and David had taken a list of chores from Winona and had started crossing them off as they finished. Today they were in the back pasture, fixing a fence. Soon it was lunchtime, and they headed inside to grab some food. Approaching the house, they noticed a hovercar outside. "Who's is that?" David asked.

"Dunno," Jim shrugged. Walking inside, he stopped in the doorway.

Bones was sitting at the table, having a cup of coffee with Winona. "Hey there," Jim said, wiping the sweat off his forehead.

"I see she's got you out doing honest labor," Bones answered, looking very brown and relaxed. "Hello there," he said to the young boy. "I'm Leonard."

"David," the boy answered, taking his hand.

"Nice to meet you, David. I'm sorry we haven't met before now, but I've been taking care of some business. And I'm a bit of an idiot," he told him.

David laughed. Jim just stood there, watching them.

"David, come show me how far you guys got this morning," Winona said, putting her arm around the boy. "I think these guys need to chat a bit," she told him, dropping a plate of sandwiches on the table in front of them.

Jim grabbed one, stuffing half of it in his mouth before they'd made it out the door. "How did you know I was here?" he asked Bones, who had grabbed one for himself.

Bones laughed. "Where else would you be, Jim?" His smile faltered a bit. "You doing alright?"

"Yeah," he said. "He's getting to know us, and I think he likes Mom. She's in love with him," he chuckled, starting on his second one.

Bones paused. "And you?"

"I'm fine," Jim nodded. "You?" he looked over him.

Bones didn't say anything for a long time. "I -" he stopped. "Jim, I'm sorry. Running off like that... I haven't done anything like that since..."

"Since you ended up on the shuttle with me to the Academy?" Jim said, surprising himself that he'd made that connection.

Bones looked up, surprised. "Yeah, I guess that was sort of the same thing. I just needed to make it all go away."

"Problems don't just disappear," Jim replied.

"I know... and I'm sorry. It was a shitty thing to do, and with him there - I'm sorry. About everything," he added slowly, looking up at Jim.

 _Bones was back..._ "Apology accepted." Jim smiled widely at him, reaching out for Bones' hand, lacing their fingers together. "I missed you," he whispered. "Come upstairs with me?"

Bones shook his head. "Not yet," he said. "We do this, Jim, we fall into bed because its something we're good at, and it doesn't solve the problems."

"Tell me what you're worried about, Bones. What am I not doing to make you happy?"

Bones hung his head. "It's not about not being happy, Jim, it's about being involved. Sometimes I just don't feel like you need me, that I'm not a real partner to you."

"That's the stupidest thing I've ever heard," Jim told him.

"Well that's how I feel, so I guess I'm just stupid," Bones replied.

"No, you're right." Jim folded his hands in front of him. "I get used to making decisions, split-second decisions based on all information that I've got at the time. I know you think that I'm not planning things out, but I am, I do. I just tend to wait until I've got all the data before I formulate my plan."

"Jesus, Jim, that sounded like a grown-up speech." Bones leaned forward. "What does that have to do with where we spend our shore leave?"

Hmmm... "Okay," he started slowly. "Perhaps I'm a bit of a control freak."

"A bit?" Bones asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Point taken," Jim answered. "I need to let go of that."

Bones shook his head. "Just when it comes to us. You want to play God on the bridge, go for it. I know your pet Vulcan will keep you from going too far off the deep end. But with me, I need to know that you want my opinion on things, even if you don't take it."

"I'm sorry that you think I didn't need you, Bones. You're everything to me, you grumpy old bastard," Jim whispered, glad to see Bones laugh at that. Just glorious, seeing that laugh. "Feel better?"

"Yeah," Bones answered, looking down. "What about you, though? Anything you want to talk about, anything you need to know?" he asked, his face tight with worry, clutching the coffee mug in front of him..

Jim caught his eye, knowing there was a conversation that they could have regarding Bones' trip to the Shore Leave Planet, but at that moment Jim decided he didn't need it. He didn't need to hear about it; he knew that he could just put it behind him.

But there was one thing he needed to know. "Just one thing." Jim reached out, taking the mug from Bones' hands, and taking them in his own hands, feeling Bones clasping tight around him. "You bored with me, McCoy?" he asked, his voice trying too hard to sound light and casual, but the smile didn't reach his eyes.

Bones let out the breath he was holding. "How could I ever be bored of you," he said, out of his chair and standing next to Jim in the blink of an eye. "You're like those supernovas that you chase, stars burning so bright it hurts your eyes to look at. I love you, Jim, more than you'll ever know."

This time, when Jim stood and pulled Bones toward the stairs, Bones didn't stop him.

* * *

Lying face down, naked on the bed in the room he'd grown up in, Jim wondered if maybe they weren't rushing things. Their problems were still there, and probably always would be, but he knew now they could talk about them without being hateful. Then Bones knelt down, sitting on his legs and started licking the sweat from his back and all rational thoughts left his mind.

"Shhh," Bones whispered as Jim started to groan, his arms wrapped around a pillow. Large hands, strong hands rubbed his shoulders, fingernails scraping slowly down his back and over his ass, then moving back up. His hips bucked into the mattress. "Don't do that," Bones growled, one hand holding onto his hipbone, gripping it while the other kept touching him, relentlessly teasing with fingertips and nails.

"So fucking beautiful," he heard Bones mutter, his hands starting to kneed at Jim's ass. Still powerfully built, Bones thought Jim's body looked better at now than it had at twenty-five. "Where is it?" he asked hoarsely, standing up and walking toward where Jim was pointing, his travel bag, and rummaged inside until he found the familiar tube. Settling back on the bed, Bones lay next to Jim, still on his stomach, looking into his eyes as he slipped one, then two fingers inside him.

Biting his lip at this torture, Jim closed his eyes and moaned. In a second Bones' lips were on his, kissing him quiet as his fingers moved with ridiculous slowness. "You're a monster," he whispered into Bones' mouth.

"I'm just getting started," Bones answered, kissing his shoulder as he slid on top of Jim, and in less than a minute slid inside in one thrust.

Jim fought to keep quiet. Making fists in the sheets, he pressed his head into the mattress as Bones slid his arms under Jim's, grabbing his shoulders and slowly thrusting into Jim. Bones' face pressed into Jim's shoulder, biting him, marking him.

Both men picked their heads up at the sound of a hovercar starting. Out the window they saw Winona and David driving away, and started to chuckle. "Shit, I hope they didn't hear anything," Jim laughed into the pillow until he felt Bones buck harder into him. "Oh," he cried out, as Bones pulled out, sat back and pulled Jim up to his hands and knees. Sliding back inside, Bones began to fuck in earnest, gripping Jim's hips and arching his back as Jim pushed against him.

Moments later Bones stilled, shuddering. "God, Jim..." he sighed into Jim's back, shaking.

A moment later he was kissing Jim's back, dragging his mouth up to his shoulders, his neck. Flipping Jim over, his mouth moved back down Jim's body, finding his cock and taking it his mouth. Jim reached down, his hands threading through Bones' hair, holding his head as he rocked into Bones' mouth. Moments later he cried out, spilling into Bones' mouth with a loud groan.

 

"So, where have you been?" Jim asked later as they lay naked, their fingers twined together.

"Oh, I've been busy," Bones told him, running a finger across his forehead, down his nose and over his lips. "I bought a little place for us to have when we're back here."

"You bought a house? Without checking with me?" Jim said, looking up at him.

"I bought a house _for_ you," he answered. "It's like an anniversary present. Having to put up with me for ten years."

"Ten years... that's a fucking long time," Jim chuckled. Ten years since they'd decided to make a go out of it, together. Seven years since they'd said forever to each other. "I never thought about being with anyone half as long," he admitted.

Bones laughed, playing with Jim's hair. "Yeah, I think we made it longer than most people thought we would."

Jim leaned up on one elbow. "Back to that house - so, it's mine?" he grinned.

"Brat," Bones laughed. "And it's not so much a house as a cabin."

"Where is my cabin?"

"Colorado," Bones answered.

Jim quirked an eyebrow. "Why in Colorado?" he wondered.

Bones shrugged, pulling Jim back down to his chest. "I liked being near the mountains." He looked down, kissing Jim's head. "And it's not Iowa, and it's not Georgia. I don't know, I guess I just wanted a place that was just ours, no memories other than the ones we put down there. A place for Jo and David to come and visit when we're here."

"I like that," Jim told him, playing with the hair on Bones' chest. "I like that alot."

"There's a barn," Bones whispered in Jim's ear.

"For what?" Jim laughed.

"Horses, I thought" Bones replied.

"Horses," Jim laughed. "That sounds perfect. You take me there?"

"When you're done here. Spend some time with your mom, let David get used to it here. We've got another ten weeks, I think."

"Something like that," he nodded, listening to Bones' heartbeat, rhythmic and steady. "Don't ever leave me again, Bones," he said, looking out the window.

"I promise you, Jim, that will never happen again." Bones wrapped his arms tight around Jim. "Cross my heart and ho-"

Jim put a finger on Bones' lips to stop him from finishing that. Eyes dark with love and longing, he slid up until he was looking down at Bones, looking at that face, eyes mirroring everything he felt back up at him. Leaning down slowly, he brushed his lips across Bones', sinking into a deeper kiss, feeling Bones' arms wrapping around him, pulling him on top of him, holding onto each other with everything they had.

 

* * *

 _Epilogue_

 

David had found his spot.

In the old barn, there was a little spot where you had to crawl up a ladder nailed to the wall and make your way into the back of the loft. No one could see you up here, and he'd prided himself on finding it almost immediately on arriving at the Colorado cabin. It was his special place...

Except that right now there was a _girl_ in his spot, an older girl, black hair hair pulled back in a ponytail. She was writing in a paper journal with an old-fashioned pen. He frowned.

She looked up at him, looking over him with an appraising look before saying, "Hey there, squirt."

"Who are you?" David asked, moving closer to the invader.

"I'm Jo," she said, scooting over. "You must be David. My dad told me you were already here."

"Yeah, my dad and I were in town getting hay for the horses." For an invader, she didn't seem half-bad. "When did you get here?"

"This morning," she replied.

 _This morning?_ "And you already found my secret spot?"

"Our spot," Jo told him. "And how secret can it be - I mean, there was a ladder, kiddo."

"I'm not a kiddo," he scowled as he scooted over to his favorite place up there, right next to the window where he could look at the mountains and sky.

She laughed. "Alright. Look, there's plenty of room for both of us."

With that he decided she was acceptable. Pulling out a leather bag from his hiding place, he offered her some of his hidden cache of candy, which she took with a 'thanks'.

"So, your dad and my dad... what does that make us?" Jo wondered aloud as she chewed on the candy.

"I dunno, you're the older one," David shrugged. "You tell me." Her journal was filled with lots of writing, and problems. "Whatcha doing?"

"Studying. Going to apply to Starfleet in a couple years."

"Really?" Since he'd been on Earth one topic that came up with regularity was Starfleet, and David was just starting to understand who his dad really was. "Whatcha gonna study?

"Engineering, with a focus in holotechnology."

"Cool," he said, popping another piece of candy in his mouth, looking at the math problems she was working on.

"What about you? You got plans, kid?" she drawled, sounding a lot like Bones.

He wondered if he was ever going to sound like Jim, and then decided he needed to listen to Jim to see what he sounded like. When he noticed she was looking at him, he realized he hadn't answered her question. "Oh me? I dunno... I'm good at science. I like animals, too," he finally said.

Jo rolled her eyes at him. "Don't tell my dad, or he'll have you working on those beasts down there. He's convinced one of these days I'm going to wake up and 'poof!', magically want to be a doctor."

"I like your dad," David told her. Bones talked to him like he wasn't an stupid kid, which made him acceptable in his eyes.

He also let him play with his empty hyposprays.

"Yeah," Jo replied, reaching over to mess up his blond hair and take another piece of candy. "I guess they're okay for old guys."

 

2009.06.30


End file.
